A Casual Drinker’s Guide For How to Avoid Hangovers

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Every casual drinker has wished at some point in their life that they could get a nice buzz without feeling the “world is ending and the only way to free yourself from the pain is to leave your earthly body behind” hangover the next day.  At 23, I’m young but my hangovers are akin to some medieval stomach- devouring virus that keeps me bedridden for days in a row while my brain, which at this point is on fire, slowly leaks out of my ears. No, I’m not being dramatic; I don’t know why you would think that.

So I’ve taken it upon myself to create a list of ways to limit the damage, because sometimes you just really need to be able to have a couple drinks and still be functional the next day.

The Method(s):

  • Drink enough water.  Here are some ways to stay hydrated: Use water as a mixer. I swear to you the best mixed drink in the world is a “Vitamin Water.” Not to be confused with the bottled drink, an alcoholic Vitamin Water consists of:
    1. One (we are trying to stay functional here, folks) shot of flavored vodka.  Cherry Three Olives is my go-to.
    2. Water
    3. SPLASH of cranberry juice.  Limiting the sugar is key; you don’t need a vodka cranberry, this is better, I promise.

If you aren’t in to using water as a mixer, just add in a glass of water between drinks. The most convenient way to do that is to order water at the same time as you order your alcohol, that way you don’t spend an incredible amount of time bothering the bartender simply for a water which, trust me folks, is annoying as hell. And if you don’t want your friends to make fun of you, add a lime and you’ll look like a real frat boy double fisting.  Always do Sober You a favor and leave a water by your bed to prevent the middle of the night stumble to the kitchen, naked, disoriented and angry that you’re awake and out of bed. Don’t overdo the water, though.  Your body has to process everything that goes in to it and chugging a gallon of water like you’re a meat head on leg day is going to put unnecessary stress on your body.

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  • Stay away from mixing different types of alcohol.  Choose one good drink and stick to it. If you HAVE TO do a shot, choose the same liquor you’re drinking and take it straight up.
  • Plan to sleep accordingly.  There’s no reason to close a bar down if you have to function the next day.  Leave an hour early to go to sleep – set yourself up for success here.
  • Eat before and after you drink.  Late night Taco Bell runs aren’t just a thing drunk college kids do, it’s a HEALTH MEASURE.  Just kidding but a good late-night snack or big breakfast is helpful for recovery as it will help maintain your blood sugar levels.
  • Supplements? What?? Obviously, an anti-inflammatory will help hangover symptoms while your body recovers, so leave some Advil on your bedside table.  But THIS is wild: some supplements that apparently help cure hangovers are red ginseng, ginger, and prickly pear. I have never tried any of these but it is worth noting that there was a study done that found people who ingested prickly pear five hours before getting drunk were able to reduce hangover symptoms by 62%?! Catch me at Whole Foods trying to figure out how the hell to ingest a prickly pear…(https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/15226168).
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  • HAIR OF THE DOG, BABY! Get another drink in ya the morning after! While I’ve actually found this method tried and true, I realize it is completely unhealthy and exceptionally unhelpful to those people who actually have to do normal human things the day after drinking and can’t just continue the bender.

None of these things are really anything new if you’ve ever been a casual drinker, but it’s helpful to remind yourself of them before you go get wild.  And WHAT you drink is as important as HOW you drink so here are some good beverages to help limit the damage…

The (Slightly Better) Drinks:

Liquors…

  • Clear alcohols. Vodka and gin are generally better than whiskey and rum.  There are enough scientific articles out there to give you the “whys”, so I’m just going to give you the conclusions.  Clear alcohols are better for helping create a less excruciating hangover (See above for the best clear liquor drink the universe has to offer).
  • Get bad and bougie with it.  Drinking high-end liquor will help for two reasons.  Top shelf (or at least not the “well,” “house,” “nail polish remover” type alcohol) is more distilled and has fewer impurities than cheap liquor, so it’s “better” (lol) for you. It also means you’re going to drink a little (a lot) less, because if you’re broke as hell, like me, you can’t afford 6 Belvedere.
  • Skip the sugary mixers. I read a lot of articles suggesting that you should replace your pop (not soda) mixer with juice to save yourself the sugar and throw in some vitamins while you’re drinking.  That’s making an incredibly bold assumption that the juices at the bar aren’t literal food-dyed sugar waters.  Bar-grade cranberry and orange juice are not even close to the real thing.  So skip both the pop and the juice, mix with water, and, if you aren’t going to do that, (Sad!) then go for the soda water. Adding a SPLASH of juice is also cool.

Wines…

  • Better red wine options…once again that sweet stuff no es bueno.  Skip the champagne (bubbles are so good, they’re bad), skip the Moscato, skip the White and Red Zinfandels.  Go for a dry Cabernet or Merlot.  The key here besides sugar is additives; you want a wine with fewer tannins.  The upside to drinking a dry red is that mixing in those waters in between will be easier because a nice cab usually makes me thirsty.
  • Better white options…as I said earlier, steer clear of the dark drinks.  So if you’re a wine drinker who doesn’t have a red vs. white preference, a drier Pinot Grigio will be less painful than a darker cab.

Beers…

  • Light beer: ugh I hate to say it.  Light beer is the bane of my existence but if you’re out to drink for the buzz and not the taste, a couple light beers are better than a couple heavy IPAs.

Quantity:

Up next is a blog on shots! What to order at the bar and what is in them, either for you to create yourself or for that awkward moment when a bartender has to ask you for ingredients

XOXO- MaiaElizabeth